iSkank

Several months ago, the wanton gratuitous blogging fitty and interweb whore, Paperlilies, attempted to quell her addiction to the internet and its numerous vices by going cold turkey for a whole week. One week without Facebook; 7 days without reading her e-mails, watching Youtube videos or guffawing at XKCD. Suffice to say, her mission failed. After less than 24 hours, she caved and began surfing once again. Imagine, therefore, my bewilderment when I found myself in the same situation. Only my predicament was not self-inflicted, oh-no! And not only that, but I had to be subjected to this webless void for more than a month. My poor MacBook has been bereft of its precious connection for so long, iAntiVirus just crashed while trying to 'update virus definitions'. Although I suspect that could be OS X telling me I shouldn't fill its time with such superfluous filth.

Many of you, I imagine, might say, "Oh, but Peter! Think of the wonderful opportunities you've missed while spending all that time on Facebook. Now's your chance to reacquaint yourself with real life!" And you'd be right. Partially. It's true, I have found myself with a lot more free time that would otherwise be spent online. And indeed, after a period of disorientation I started clawing back those precious hours lost to the Lolcats. I've got so much done! Moved house AND unpacked; built an Ikea flatpack bed, desk and wardrobe; sorted out my finances; done countless hours of housework and washing; I even started going to bed and getting up at semi-reasonable times. But the social world has completely shifted over the past couple of years - at least within my circles. Facebook is in most cases the sole relied-upon source for organising events and meetups, which means when it comes to going out, I'm sort of left in the dark at the moment.